Control Amidst Chaos

While I have five children of my own, even I sometimes need to be reminded of how to get the kids under control amidst chaos. It can be very challenging.

If you are having trouble with too much volume and chaos in your home, I would start with 2 rules. Once you have conquered obedience with those two rules you can add one or two rules at a time from there.

The first rule would be "No yelling - use quiet voices inside". The second rule would be "No running inside the house - walk". I would tell the kids that loud voices and running are for the playground. When you explain the rules to the kids, have each one of them repeat the rule back to you. Ask each one of them if they understand what the rules mean. If each of them says yes, then they are responsbile for the rule. Then, they cannot come back to you and say they did not know what the rule was.

Then, every single time a child gets loud or runs put them in time out for the same number of minutes as their individual age. Keep a timer handy. The first few days you may very well be doing nothing else except putting children in time out over and over and over. They will test you to see if you mean it, but be consistent. If they get up from time out then simply get them and put them back in time out until the time is served. Choose at least a couple of different corners or seats or rugs or spots on the floor for time out. Then, always use the same spots. If your children are in time out over and over 2,5, 10 times or on and on. That is okay. Eventually, they will get tired of being in time out. They will get tired of missing out on play time, meals, or whatever else may be going on.

If you are out in public, reiterate the rules before you have the kids go into a store with you. Stand your ground. Even in a grocery store, you can have the kids stand in time out staring at the tomato sauce or cheerios. Or they can lose the privilege of walking and be put into the cart etc. You will succeed. You are a good mom, and you will feel better for sticking to the rules you set out. Even my own daughter, who at first I was convinced time out would never work on, gets tired of going back in the same time out over and over. This method works on children old and young, special needs or on target. The consistency really is the key.

God bless your journey,
Jennifer Richardson
Academy of the Possible
Mom to 5 kids, 14 boy, 12 girl, 9 boy, 7 boy, 4 girl